New Blog, Old Story February 14, 2009
Posted by John Moeller in Blog, Personal, School.1 comment so far
This is most of the “about” page of my new blog that I’m setting up for my PhD studies. I wanted to relate the whole story of why I’m doing what I’m doing:
This is a blog about using topology to compute, hopefully educating a few people on the subject of topology, and tossing a career aside to pursue a PhD. If you’ve come here expecting a topo map geek, you’re looking for a much different kind of geek (and one that’s probably in much better shape). I do like maps quite a bit, though. And I’ll probably talk about them in an abstract sense.
[Math babble removed]
So what’s this about tossing away my career? My undergrad degree is in math, but that’s not where I ended up. I landed in software, and I’ve been working as a programmer long enough to qualify for “senior software engineer” positions. Despite the fact that I’ve been laid off a few times due to various economic fluctuations, it was a good career. About a year ago, I decided that I was tired of working on other people’s ideas. I wanted to command a better salary, have more choice in what I could do, and above all, get some freedom in choosing projects. I decided to see about a Master’s. I took a few classes to get a feel for it, and at the end of a semester, one of my profs convinced me to try for a PhD instead. It’s almost a year later, and I’ve been accepted to the program at the University of Utah and officially start in Fall (though I’m doing research now).
People who know what’s involved in my choices probably think that I’m crazy. That’s certainly true. However, I’d have to say that it would be more insane for me to keep a career that seems (to my experience) to reward mediocrity. It’s not that you can’t do good work in software. I have known many excellent engineers over the years, and they are extremely bright people. I get the idea that the tech industry as a whole isn’t interested in pushing the boundary, especially during recessions. There are, of course, companies that do push the boundary, but they hire researchers to do it. Microsoft, nVidia, Google, AT&T, Cisco; all of them have the juice to hire docs. The rest are more than happy to reward a good idea that sells, but investing in the effort is a concept that seems to be lost on them. After a while, it becomes a matter of investment for the engineer as well. If for the same amount, I can do less work, why do more? This is the sad state of affairs for many industries, not just software.
So my decision was basically made for me when my company laid me off and 4 other engineers (it wasn’t for my whining either; I still have a good relationship with my old bosses and coworkers). I decided that it was an opportunity to make school a priority. Research is what I really want to do, despite my advisor’s warnings. So here I am. And you get to read me babble about topology.
You can find it here, if you’re interested.
This Blog February 8, 2009
Posted by John Moeller in Blog, Personal.2 comments
I haven’t felt like blogging much lately, and I’m wondering if it’s because of my transitional phase. I’m probably going to start a research blog, which I’m sure will be very exciting to all of you (!). I don’t know if that will take up all of my blogging time, or if I’ll still blog here as well. I’m not sure why I didn’t blog more after I was laid off. I think that may have had something to do with the drama that ensued in the comments on my last meat post (at least half of which was surely my doing).
After it settled down, I was afraid that I’d have to write every blog entry in a way that was unambiguous to everyone on the Internet. I realize now that that’s just silly. This is my blog. It’s my opinion, and people who visit should remember that. I’m not holding myself out as some kind of expert on ethics. In fact, I stated that I wasn’t. Additionally, this is a skeptically-minded blog. If people bring arguments against what I say, I try to counter them. I’m not going to hedge my tone. I can’t cater to the entire Internet.
My mistake was probably just that; in catering to the idea that I needed to defend my tone. I spent a lot of time dancing around the issue when I should have realized that one of the commenters was shifting the burden of clarity too far over to my side. What I should have done is avoid restating what I said, and insist on direct questions. I should have forced arguments about tone out of the thread entirely (since it was an ethical discussion), and it should have been about explicit questions, claims, and statements. Instead I fed straight into the drama that was brought to my door.
To get back to blogging, I think that it’s been a good outlet for me. I’m just not sure where I’m going to do it right now. Obviously, I need to keep a lid on my emotions if I’m going to do it as part of a research setting. Blogging right after you think “what the hell do they mean by that?” is probably a bad practice. That’s one of those times where you go do something mindless for a while to clear your head.
The Year in Review (What I Can Remember, Anyway) January 2, 2009
Posted by John Moeller in Blog, Internet, Personal, Politics, Science, atheism.2 comments
I’ve run out of things to do, so I guess I’ll write a blog post.
So, a bunch of stuff happened in 2008. It’s been a pretty eventful year in the world as a whole. This is what it’s been for me:
Going to school
Much of my time and effort has gone into attending school this year. It’s been interesting, and I didn’t really give myself much of a reprieve over the summer. I finished my application, all of my recommendations from endorsers are in (finally!), and now I just get to wait for the result. I decided that I’m going to take two classes again, but it’s going to be easier this time because I only go to class 3 days a week instead of 5.
Less atheism, more secularism
I kind of dropped off the atheism scene, simply because the meetup times just didn’t work with my schedule. I didn’t really start going again since. I’m not less of an atheist, really. Just less of an active atheist. My interests in that area have really shifted more toward science education, separation of church and state, and science policy. Though my total activism output has lessened since I’ve been attending school.
Politics
You’d have to live under a rock or in a remote village not to have followed politics at all this year. What a ride! This has to have been the most exciting election in my memory. Plus, in issues that I’ve been following, Obama has made a commitment to better science education and better science policy. We’ll see if he follows through on that. On the more unfortunate side, we’ve seen Proposition 8 get passed in California. This is a vile stain on our country, and I predict that it will propel the issue of gay rights farther forward than we’ve ever seen it.
2008 is also the year that I really got into Twitter. Twitter is a really odd beast. I don’t think that you can really get the power of Twitter unless you have a mobile. It really became obvious to me how cool it was after I connected my mobile to my account (I also get free unlimited texts). I was one of the many people who followed MarsPhoenix. It was really cool to find out firsthand when the lander found ice. I’ve since added all of the other NASA missions that use Twitter.
Sometimes Twitter’s tedious, when someone decides that they need to go on about something, but when all is said and done, tweets like this make it all worthwhile. When you can watch your friends descend into a drunken stupor without being there to see it? ‘Nuff said.
New Theme, Again December 22, 2008
Posted by John Moeller in Blog.Tags: theme
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I couldn’t stand that last one. I felt like I needed to eat cotton candy.
I like this one a lot better, even though the font size is small. The moon up in the corner is a nice touch.
Are You a Hardcore Atheist? December 16, 2008
Posted by John Moeller in Blog, atheism.1 comment so far
Hemant has a little exercise for atheist bloggers. He requests that we boldface the items below that we have done and get a score.
I get 11. It’s fun, and silly, but I have a couple issues with the list:
- Been unable to watch Growing Pains reruns because of Kirk Cameron: I can’t watch Growing Pains because it’s stupid.
- All this Bible nonsense: Who wrote this idiotic rule that in order to be an atheist, you have to obsess about the Bible? I have much better things to do with my time than to read that book. That’s one of the reasons that I became an atheist in the first place. It’s not like every atheist has to be an armchair theologian on the off chance that he or she might get to debate someone. Same goes for #42 or #48.
- Have ever chosen not to clasp your hands together out of fear someone might think you’re praying: It’s not fear. Clasping hands is part of the act. As for doing it outside of the context of a group prayer, I don’t care if someone sees me lean my forehead on my clasped hands, and then lean back muttering under my breath. That’s something that I do all the time when I think. It only seems to be the overly religious that try to interpret every action as something related to religion.
- Refuse to tell anyone what your “sign” is… because it doesn’t matter at all: Actually, I like all of that stuff. I don’t buy it, because it’s bunk, but I still think it’s interesting. It’s the same reason that I like knowing about the nomenclature of angels or demons, or being familiar with Tolkien’s Middle-Earth mythology.
Other observations:
- Used the Flying Spaghetti Monster in a religious debate with someone: I’ve come close. For whatever reason, I find FSM, Invisible Pink Unicorn and the like to be a tad pedantic (though you really aren’t a true member of the atheist community without knowing what these are, and some of the history behind them). I think that it’s more effective to use the Thor or Zeus argument.
- Have already made plans to donate your body to science after you die: I’m strongly thinking about doing this. The medical community is always short on this incredibly valuable teaching resource, and I think that it might be one of the most significant things that I could do to aid humanity. My body won’t do me any good after I’m dead, and a marker or monument would serve the same purpose as a grave, except less wasteful.
- Had to think twice before screaming “Oh God!” during sex. Or you said something else in its place: I don’t exclaim a lot during coitus. However, you would be surprised at how hard it is to rid yourself of religiously-based exclamations that you’ve been used to using in your daily life. I still find myself using “god damn it!” or even “Jesus H. Christ!” That last one I picked up from my mother, from whom I also picked up much of my colorful vocabulary. I did find out, after watching Zodiac, that the “H.” stands for “Howard.”
Here’s the list:
- Participated in the Blasphemy Challenge.
- Met at least one of the “Four Horsemen” (Richard Dawkins, Daniel Dennett, Christopher Hitchens, Sam Harris) in person.
- Created an atheist blog.
- Used the Flying Spaghetti Monster in a religious debate with someone.
- Gotten offended when someone called you an agnostic.
- Been unable to watch Growing Pains reruns because of Kirk Cameron.
- Own more Bibles than most Christians you know.
- Have at least one Bible with your personal annotations regarding contradictions, disturbing parts, etc.
- Have come out as an atheist to your family.
- Attended a campus or off-campus atheist gathering.
- Are a member of an organized atheist/Humanist/etc. organization.
- Had a Humanist wedding ceremony.
- Donated money to an atheist organization.
- Have a bookshelf dedicated solely to Richard Dawkins.
- Lost the friendship of someone you know because of your non-theism.
- Tried to argue or have a discussion with someone who stopped you on the street to proselytize.
- Had to hide your atheist beliefs on a first date because you didn’t want to scare him/her away.
- Own a stockpile of atheist paraphernalia (bumper stickers, buttons, shirts, etc).
- Attended a protest that involved religion.
- Attended an atheist conference.
- Subscribe to Pat Condell’s YouTube channel.
- Started an atheist group in your area or school.
- Successfully “de-converted” someone to atheism.
- Have already made plans to donate your body to science after you die.
- Told someone you’re an atheist only because you wanted to see the person’s reaction.
- Had to think twice before screaming “Oh God!” during sex. Or you said something else in its place.
- Lost a job because of your atheism.
- Formed a bond with someone specifically because of your mutual atheism (meeting this person at a local gathering or conference doesn’t count).
- Have crossed “In God We Trust” off of — or put a pro-church-state-separation stamp on — dollar bills.
- Refused to recite the Pledge of Allegiance.
- Said “Gesundheit!” (or nothing at all) after someone sneezed because you didn’t want to say “Bless you!”
- Have ever chosen not to clasp your hands together out of fear someone might think you’re praying.
- Have turned on Christian TV because you need something entertaining to watch.
- Are a 2nd or 3rd (or more) generation atheist.
- Have “atheism” listed on your Facebook or dating profile — and not a euphemistic variant.
- Attended an atheist’s funeral (i.e. a non-religious service).
- Subscribe to an freethought magazine (e.g. Free Inquiry, Skeptic)
- Have been interviewed by a reporter because of your atheism.
- Written a letter-to-the-editor about an issue related to your non-belief in God.
- Gave a friend or acquaintance a New Atheist book as a gift.
- Wear pro-atheist clothing in public.
- Have invited Mormons/Jehovah’s Witnesses into your house specifically because you wanted to argue with them.
- Have been physically threatened (or beaten up) because you didn’t believe in God.
- Receive Google Alerts on “atheism” (or variants).
- Received fewer Christmas presents than expected because people assumed you didn’t celebrate it.
- Visited The Creation Museum or saw Ben Stein’s Expelled just so you could keep tabs on the “enemy.”
- Refuse to tell anyone what your “sign” is… because it doesn’t matter at all.
- Are on a mailing list for a Christian organization just so you can see what they’re up to…
- Have kept your eyes open while you watched others around you pray.
- Avoid even Unitarian churches because they’re too close to religion for you.
He gives a scale, of course, to see where you end up:
0-10: Impressive, but not too far from agnosticism.
11-20: You are, literally, a “New Atheist.” But you now have something to strive for! Go for the full 50!
21-30: You are an atheist, but babies aren’t running away from you. Yet.
31-40: You are the 5th Horseman! Congratulations!
41-50: PZ Myers will now be taking lessons from you.
Happy Meme December 6, 2008
Posted by John Moeller in Blog, Personal.Tags: happy meme, meme
1 comment so far
This time, it’s for the “Happy Meme.” List ten things that you are happy about or thankful for. Tag ten people that you’re happy to call a friend at the end of the post.
- Good friends who are willing to go out of their way to help me out.
- Sweet potatoes. I know that it’s not common to enjoy these in this part of the country, but I think they’re quite tasty.
- SCIENCE! ‘Nuff said.
- Supportive, understanding, and loving family. I’m lucky to have grown up believing that this was normal.
- Good professors who are willing to put up with my crap.
- The Internet. Just yesterday, I heard about two different groups of kids, one who verified and one who invalidated the existence of Santa Claus using a web search.
- The Renaissance.
- Achewood, xkcd, and Thinkin’ Lincoln.
- Bush will be out of the White House very, very soon.
- My spouse, Quirky. She is fun, smart, and always keeps me guessing.
I’m not going to tag anyone, just direct my readers to comment here with your list or write an entry about it.
New Theme December 5, 2008
Posted by John Moeller in Blog.Tags: theme
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Everything I use has a new theme lately, so I thought that I’d change it up a little here, too.
This theme is called Fresh Bananas. It’s a little like ordering a drink with watermelon liqueur, but the nice part about it is that it’s easy to look at.
This is a Meme That I Can Get Behind… November 29, 2008
Posted by John Moeller in Blog, Internet.Tags: meme
4 comments
…the “Six Random Things” meme.
For those unfamiliar, a blog meme is a little different from an internet meme. An internet meme’s reproductive success springs naturally from its absurdity or coolness factor. A blog meme must be laboriously nurtured like some kind of informational orchid, or perhaps a pot-bellied pig. There is usually some kind of guilt mechanism to get it to reproduce (kind of like chain emails), and some set of rules that define what goes into it.
The rules:
- Link to the person who tagged you (done and done); Tommy didn’t really tag me, Poodles did. But I like Tommy too.
- Post the rules on your blog (um, yeah)
- Write six random arbitrary things about yourself (grr, see below)
- Tag six people at the end of your post and link to them (six? hell no, this meme gets two; okay, four)
- Let each person know they’ve been tagged and leave a comment on their blog (memes are so much work…)
- Let the tagger know when your entry is up. (done, through the magic of trackbacks)
Six Arbitrary Things about Me:
- I dislike the misuse of the word random. Normally, I make a serious attempt not to be a curmudgeon about these things. Language evolves, after all. The word is being overused to the point of dilution, however. Random means specific things, like “without purpose” or “based on chance.”
I’m not rolling a die to come up with these personal details, and the point of this meme is to get you to know me better, and to induce more Web linkage. I.e., there is a purpose to it. Not random. Arbitrary is the word that describes this kind of list. Grr.
- I go through intense food phases. Every so often, I get really into a specific kind of food, like cheese or chocolate. In fact, cheese is a recurring food phase. It can literally be anything, from a specific brand of snack to cocktails. These usually last about two to three weeks.
- Happiness to me is not the same as contentment. I’ve had plenty of time in my life to be content, and I can’t seem to do it. I need a focus for my efforts.
- When playing RPG’s on the computer, I always make a female character given the choice. I just like having something nicer to look at than a burly man while I play.
- The more that I travel, the more that I start to realize why Easterners think that Utahns don’t know what service is.
- Professional life has dulled my ability to express what I mean without equivocating or couching what I mean in protective layers.
Taggees:
Life Scores Another Goal on Me November 10, 2008
Posted by John Moeller in Blog, Personal, School.1 comment so far
Ok, so it’s been almost a week since the election; you probably want to see something other than that stupid widget. I completed a draft of my personal statement, and sent it to a couple reviewers. After that, I had precisely zero desire to write a damn thing. I’m creatively drained, though I’ve regained some strength.
Midterms/School/Finals
It turns out that I did pretty well in comparison on the Midterms; I found out the scores since my last post about them. I’m usually a harsh critic of myself, so this isn’t surprising. School is still eating up a lot of my time, but it’s enjoyable. I don’t get much of a reprieve, though, since finals and final projects are being discussed now. In fact, I should be working on homework instead of blogging, but whatever (actually, I’m working on homework while I’m blogging; it turns out that the computer does a lot of work for you with ML assignments).
Personal Statement
Like I said above, I finished a draft of my personal statement. For those unaware, a personal statement is an approximately one-page autobiography that is supposed to convince an admissions committee that you’ve got your shit together and that you’ve done something worthy of going there. Oh, and that you can write. If that sounds difficult, it is. In fact, many applicants report it as the most difficult part of the admissions process.
Life
There was a darker part of Quirky’s past that reared its head recently, so we’ve also been dealing with that. I’m obviously not going to get into that here, since it’s not my story to tell; suffice it to say that I’m trying to be supportive without being overly protective. I’ve been trying also to get some quality time in with Quirky; it’s hard with school and work, and writing the statement has made it harder.
Work
Something always has to give when you try to do too much, and unfortunately, it’s been work. I feel bad about it, but at the same time, I don’t know what would have happened if I let something else go. Fortunately, my boss is understanding, but I still feel like I could have done a little bit better.
My lapse with work has also made me realize that I will probably need to cut back my responsibilities in September of next year, assuming I’m accepted. Next semester won’t be as hard; I won’t have as much of a course load. In September, however, I’ll be trying to do more than I was trying to do this semester. I was hoping that I could get away with putting that off until September of 2010, when I start really diving into research.
A friend told me that no matter what you do, you always feel guilty about any free time that you take. It’s turning out to be true. I need another vacation. But I’d feel guilty the whole time, so there’s really no point.
Request for Utah Atheist and Agnostic Blogs November 2, 2008
Posted by John Moeller in Blog, Internet, atheism.Tags: Utah
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Oh, while I’m handing out chores, find me some atheist/agnostic blogs by people who live in Utah. Not Utahns, mind you, unless their expatriate status is temporary. What I want is blogs by atheists/agnostics who know the Utah experience or are newly discovering it, and are currently living it. So PZ Meyers doesn’t count, even though he lived here for a bit (I think). Everyone knows about Pharyngula anyway.
This doesn’t even have to be limited to blogs. This can be YouTube profiles, for example. Other important Utah atheist links will get a section of their own, outside of this list (when I get the time). That includes organizations and Internet forums. Other more personally-related atheist links will get their own section as well (that includes you, chanson :-) ).
What I want is a list of atheists and agnostics who are part of the Utah culture, and are sharing their experience on the Internet. Can you help me out?
